Why Self-Advocacy is Essential in Today’s Healthcare System: Especially in Cancer Care
In today’s fast-paced, overburdened healthcare system, one truth has become painfully clear: no one will ever care about your health more than you do.
This isn’t to say that healthcare providers don’t care—they do. Many of them are compassionate, knowledgeable, and dedicated. But with overflowing patient loads, insurance restrictions, and time-limited appointments, the reality is that patients can easily fall through the cracks. Critical symptoms get overlooked. Delays happen. Decisions are made without the patient truly understanding—or agreeing with—them.
This is why self-advocacy is no longer optional. It is your greatest tool for survival, particularly when facing life-altering conditions like cancer.
My Story: When I Learned to Speak Up—The Hard Way
Even as an adult, with years of experience in the fitness and wellness industry, I found myself blindsided when faced with complex medical decisions. I didn’t know how to ask the right questions. I didn’t even realize I could. I felt powerless, swept along by a medical system that was too fast, too impersonal, and too overwhelming to fully understand.
I trusted that the people in white coats had all the answers—that they knew what was best for me. But what I learned, through difficult experiences and hard-won medical treatment, is that sometimes they don’t. And sometimes, even when they do, their answers don’t align with your values, your goals, or your gut instincts.
It took years—and far too many setbacks—for me to realize that I had a voice. And that voice wasn’t just important—it could change the entire course of my life.
I’ve seen the same scenario play out repeatedly with clients I’ve worked with—people who were told to “watch and wait” only to discover months later that what was supposedly “nothing” was actually stage III cancer. Had the lump been removed when it was first discovered, they may have been able to avoid costly and mentally/physically painful treatment, not to mention a less optimal prognosis.
I’ve lived it myself when I was told I “probably didn’t have cancer” while hemorrhaging from my rectum, simply because I had a colonoscopy two years prior.
And I’ve felt the sting of those words again when, despite my mother having had breast cancer three times, I was told to “watch and wait” with my own breast lumps—as if my family history, my anxiety, and my very real risk didn’t matter. Last year, when I barely had the use of my legs due to a cyst in my spinal column (we didn’t know that at the time), upon arriving at the E.R. I was told they were scheduling for MRIs three weeks out. It was unacceptable, and I took things into my own hands until I got the answers I needed. I was in surgery a few weeks later.
That’s when I realized:
➡️ If I didn’t speak up, no one would do it for me.
➡️ If I didn’t ask the hard questions, no one was going to volunteer the answers.
➡️ Sometimes you just have to do what you have to do to get the MRI, the CT scan, the biopsy…..
It wasn’t easy, and it still isn’t always easy. But today, I know the importance of taking an active role in my healthcare and encouraging the same for those that I know and love. While there are times when watchful waiting is a reasonable approach, there are also times when it can lead to missed opportunities for timely intervention. Being informed, asking the right questions, and speaking up can make all the difference.
No one should ever fear asking for more information or seeking additional guidance. A good healthcare team will support second opinions—they should welcome it. When your life is on the line, you have every right to explore every option.
What Does Self-Advocacy Mean in Health Care?
Self-advocacy means taking an active role in your healthcare decisions rather than being a passive participant. It means:
Asking questions until you understand
Requesting second opinions when you’re uncertain
Saying no to treatments or approaches that don’t feel right for you
Speaking up about symptoms, side effects, or fears that others might dismiss
For cancer patients, especially, this can be the difference between receiving standard care and receiving personalized, timely, life-saving care.
The “Watch and Wait” Approach: When Doing Nothing Feels Like Too Little
One area where self-advocacy becomes critical is in situations where the recommended approach is “watch and wait”- also known as active surveillance. This is commonly used in cases of:
Low-grade prostate cancer
Certain types of non-Hodgkin's lymphoma
Ductal Carcinoma In Situ (DCIS) in the breast
In some cases, this is the safest and most evidence-based approach. But let’s be honest: being told to “wait” while cancer sits inside you is terrifying.
This is where you must advocate for yourself:
Ask: How often will I be monitored?
Ask: What specific signs will trigger the need for treatment?
Ask: What are the risks of waiting vs. taking action now?
Ask: Are there integrative approaches (nutrition, exercise, stress reduction) I can begin now to lower my risk?
Doctors may not always have these discussions unless you initiate them. But you deserve full information, full transparency, and full partnership in your care.
How This Plays Out—Especially for Older Adults
This fear of speaking up, asking questions, or seeking a second opinion is especially common among older adults. I’ve seen it time and time again—not only with clients but within my own family.
Many individuals from older generations were raised to view doctors as unquestionable authorities. They grew up in an era when it wasn’t common—or even acceptable—to challenge medical advice. The idea of asking for a second opinion, voicing concerns, or declining a recommendation can feel uncomfortable or even disrespectful to them.
I’ve witnessed this firsthand with my 86-year-old mother, who is currently facing stage IV cancer. Despite the seriousness of her condition, she was afraid to get a second opinion—not because she didn’t want more information, but because she was genuinely worried that her oncologist might “fire” her as a patient if she dared to question the plan.
This kind of fear is not uncommon:
Many senior patients worry about being labeled as “difficult” or “non-compliant.”
They may fear being abandoned by the healthcare system altogether if they assert themselves.
They may feel overwhelmed by medical jargon or believe they’re simply “too old” to be offered more proactive care.
Unfortunately, this reluctance can lead to delayed diagnoses, inadequate care, or missed opportunities for better outcomes. When older adults don’t feel empowered to advocate for themselves—or don’t have someone to advocate alongside them—they often accept less than they deserve.
That’s why it’s so important to encourage and support self-advocacy at every age. For older adults, this might mean:
Bringing a trusted family member or friend to appointments to help ask questions and take notes.
Writing down concerns in advance to make sure nothing gets overlooked.
Reinforcing the idea that it’s okay—and often recommended—to seek additional opinions.
No one should ever fear that they’ll lose their care simply for wanting to make the most informed choices about their health. Empowered patients—of any age—tend to have better experiences, clearer understanding of their options, and more confidence in their decisions.
Modern healthcare, especially in oncology, is complicated:
Specialists focus on their narrow slice of the puzzle.
Time with each patient is often limited to 15 minutes or less.
Insurance companies influence treatment decisions.
In this environment, even well-meaning doctors can overlook symptoms, dismiss concerns, or make assumptions that don’t serve you. This is especially true for:
Women (whose pain and symptoms are more likely to be dismissed)
People of color
Young adults (who may be told they're “too young” for serious diseases like cancer)
This is why your voice matters.
Without self-advocacy:
Delays in diagnosis are more likely.
Suboptimal treatment choices can be made.
Emotional and mental health needs may be ignored.
The Limits of Conventional Medicine—and the Need to Look Beyond
Another important reason to become your own advocate is the reality that traditional medical doctors (MDs) often operate within the boundaries of allopathic medicine -the conventional, Western approach that focuses on diagnosing and treating disease, usually through pharmaceuticals, surgery, and other medical interventions.
This isn’t to say that allopathic medicine doesn’t have tremendous value. It absolutely does - it saves lives every day. But it’s also true that many physicians are not trained to look beyond this framework. Most receive limited education in areas like nutrition, exercise, integrative therapies, or mind-body approaches that could complement or enhance standard care.
The result is that patients are often presented with a narrow set of options:
Medication
Radiation
Surgery
Chemotherapy
What’s missing are the broader, evidence-based tools that support healing, quality of life, and even prevention, such as:
Nutrition and anti-inflammatory eating
Exercise and movement as medicine
Stress reduction techniques and mental health support
Complementary therapies like acupuncture, herbal medicine, or functional medicine
I’ve seen this firsthand, both in my own cancer journey and in working with countless clients. Many people don’t even realize that other resources and approaches exist—because no one in the traditional system mentions them.
That’s where self-advocacy and independent research come in. You may need to:
Look beyond your primary doctor for additional support - such as integrative oncologists, functional medicine practitioners, nutritionists, cancer exercise specialists, or mental health professionals.
Ask specifically about lifestyle changes that can help, rather than assuming that treatment is the only option on the table.
Explore complementary therapies that can work alongside conventional care -not as a replacement, but as a holistic approach to healing.
The reality is that no single doctor or system holds all the answers. The best outcomes often come from a collaborative, multi-disciplinary approach—one that you may have to initiate.
Key Questions to Ask When Exploring Complementary Cancer Care:
Is this approach evidence-based and has it been studied in cancer populations?
Can this therapy safely complement my current treatment without causing harm or interaction?
What are the potential risks, benefits, and costs?
Is the provider licensed and experienced in working with cancer patients?
7 Practical Ways to Be Your Own Best Advocate:
Get Educated: Understand your diagnosis and treatment options using reputable sources (avoid Dr. Google—look for hospital systems, cancer organizations, and peer-reviewed journals).
Take Notes or Bring a Support Person: You won’t remember everything. Written notes or a second set of ears can catch what you miss.
Ask Every Question—Even the “Stupid” Ones: There are no stupid questions when your life is on the line.
Request All Records: Imaging reports, pathology, bloodwork—keep copies of everything.
Get a Second (or Third) Opinion: Especially when faced with major decisions or if something doesn’t sit right with you.
Track Symptoms: Keep a daily journal of how you feel physically and emotionally.
Speak Up About Your Fears: Mental health is part of your care. Don’t suffer in silence.
The Emotional Side of Advocacy: You Deserve to Be Heard
It’s not just about the facts—it’s about the feelings.
Many cancer patients share that the hardest part isn’t the surgery, the chemo, or the scans. It’s the fear of being ignored. The uncertainty of waiting. The helplessness that can set in when decisions are made for you, not with you.
I want you to hear this loud and clear:
Your fears are valid.
Your voice matters.
You are allowed to take up space, ask for time, and demand clarity.
You Are the Constant in Your Care
Doctors come and go. Nurses change shifts. Treatments evolve. But you are the constant. You are the one who will live with the consequences of every medical decision made. That’s why your voice belongs at the center of every conversation.
And if you need a gentle push:
You are not “being difficult” for speaking up. You are being brave. You are being wise. You are being your own best advocate.
Want to dive deeper right now? Paid subscribers can instantly access:
“10 Questions Every Cancer Patient Should Ask Their Oncologist” — plus a printable checklist to take to your next appointment so you never leave without the answers you need.
Herbs and Foods That May Interfere with Cancer Treatment: Research-Backed Guidance
Exclusive deep-dive articles on:
Navigating second opinions with confidence
Building your cancer care team beyond the traditional medical model
Anti-inflammatory meal plans and exercise strategies for recovery and prevention
Mindset, stress management, and emotional healing through cancer and beyond
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👉Download 10 Questions Every Cancer Patient Should Ask Their Oncologist PDF
👉 Download Herbs and Foods That May Interfere with Cancer Treatment: Research-Backed Guidance
Helpful Resources for Cancer Patients Seeking Alternative & Integrative Care
Educational & Evidence-Based Organizations
Society for Integrative Oncology (SIO)
https://integrativeonc.orgA leading organization dedicated to advancing evidence-based integrative therapies in cancer care. Their guidelines cover nutrition, mind-body therapies, acupuncture, exercise, and more.
Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center—About Herbs Database
https://www.mskcc.org/cancer-care/integrative-medicine/about-herbs-botanicals-other-products
A free, scientifically-backed database to check interactions, safety, and efficacy of herbs, supplements, and botanicals commonly used in cancer care.National Center for Complementary and Integrative Health (NCCIH)
https://www.nccih.nih.govA division of the NIH offering up-to-date research on alternative and complementary therapies, including acupuncture, mind-body practices, and dietary supplements.
Nutrition & Lifestyle Support
Oncology Nutrition (Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics)
https://www.oncologynutrition.orgProvides guidance on nutrition during and after cancer treatment, including managing side effects, boosting immunity, and promoting recovery.
Food for Breast Cancer
https://foodforbreastcancer.comAn evidence-based resource on anti-cancer foods, recipes, and dietary strategies, with a special focus on breast cancer prevention and survivorship.
Exercise & Movement for Cancer Recovery
Cancer Exercise Training Institute (CETI)
https://www.thecancerspecialist.comProvides specialized exercise guidance for cancer survivors, delivered by certified OncoVie™ Cancer Exercise Specialists worldwide.
Livestrong at the YMCA
https://www.livestrong.org/ymca
A free or low-cost community-based exercise program for cancer survivors, offered at many YMCAs across the U.S. The program focuses on rebuilding strength, stamina, and confidence in a supportive group environment.
Mind-Body Medicine & Emotional Wellbeing
Healing Circles Global
https://healingcirclesglobal.orgFree virtual peer-support circles for people affected by cancer, offering connection, compassion, and healing through shared experiences.
Smith Center for Healing and the Arts
https://smithcenter.orgOffers integrative cancer support including meditation, art therapy, nutrition counseling, and retreats for people living with cancer.
Finding Integrative Oncology Care Providers
OncANP (Oncology Association of Naturopathic Physicians)
https://onc-anp.orgA directory of licensed naturopathic doctors specializing in oncology who offer complementary care alongside conventional treatment.
Integrative Medicine for Oncology Directory (SIO)
https://integrativeonc.org/find-a-professional
Search for integrative oncology professionals worldwide, including MDs, acupuncturists, dietitians, and others trained in whole-person cancer care.